Rended Press

For another group-think experiment over on Gorgonmilk's blog : click to embiggen 1. True Shem is a meter wide strip of land between Near Shem and Far Shem. The people of Far Shem believe their nation owns the True Shem. The people of Near Shem believe the people of Far Shem to be heretics, as all Near Shemites know that True Shem is ruled by Near Shem. Neither Far Shemites nor Near Shemites may pass through True Shem without the proper prayers and petitions and performing the intricate, sacred ritual of Ear Purging. Because of the demands of this ritual, Near Shemites and Far Shemites do not trade with one another. Thus have Korsh-Emish and Near Stygia profited by encouraging both Shems to pursue their claims against one another on the field of battle. 2. Each of the Baracha Isles worships a different aspect of Barach, Petty God of Sacrificial Goats. One island worships The Black Goat, one The White Bleat, one The Mottled Liver, one The Marbled Eye, etc. On the high

EDIT 2: Well this idea went over like a lead balloon. That's fine. I'll just have to write this up myself--which is probably what I should have done in the first place. I'll see if I can flesh this out in the coming days/weeks. EDIT 1: Hey, all you looky-loos from YDIS--put your monkey where your mouth is and fill out a location. What's the matter? Afraid that someone will make a silly 'toon out of your entry? Awww....it's okay. You can still hide behind your anonymity so no one will know you're using your mom's computer while she's making you a sammich. It sure is fun to make fun of other people on the internet, isn't it? It sure makes you feel pretty powerful, like when you let your Decepticons win all the fights against Voltron and the Thundercats. Mmmmmm.....Thundercats. On some planets, when the gods die, their bodies fall to earth, wreaking weird and horrible havoc to the land as they decay. A god's digestive system creates nightma

Here we go again ! Here are my entries for this table so far; I'll update this if I come up with more entries. 3. Pickled Goblin In some parts of the underworld, highly acidic minerals have leeched into goblin burial cairns, effectively pickling the goblin corpses. These rare specimens are highly sought after, as they make excellent light sources when burned. The unique minerals somehow preserve and transform the goblin corpse into a wax-like substance that can burn brighter than the light of six torches for hours on end. It is said a single pickled goblin finger was used to map the entire five levels of Solomon's Cave, including the underground reservoir. An entire pickled goblin once went for over 1,500gp at auction at Haversham Sons Auctioneers in Taverntoss. However, most dungeoneers consider it bad luck to remove a pickled goblin from its final resting place and settle for breaking off just enough to meet their needs. 5. Driftstone Found in rare caches within the

Just a quick note to say that I've got a mirror of Gorgonmilk's zine. I've un-rar'ed them and zipped them for easy decompression: Underworld Lore

I teach a creative writing course and a digital narratives course at a community college. On my birthday, I tossed the regularly scheduled programming and had my students write classfieds and dungeon slang. Here is the third and final post presenting their creations. I've edited them a bit in terms of place names to make them fit with the setting I've developed over the course of the classifieds. All typos are my errors and I will correct if found. Dumblesnort . Deep, obnoxious laugh, usu. coming from a large, hairy man. Dumbsel . A stupid, in-bred royal princess, esp. one whose rescue is the subject of a quest. Frogsicle . Frozen frog on a stick; favorite summertime treat of many ogres in thrall to ice wizards. Gratch . A homely girl from the grasslands, esp. one whose rescue is the subject of a quest. Gleer ( -ed , -ing ). To smile in an intimidating or horryfing fashion; most notably seen on goblins and trolls before devouring a victim, i.e. "Did you see tha

Part 1 can be found here . I teach a creative writing course and a digital narratives course at a community college. On my birthday, I tossed the regularly scheduled programming and had my students write classifieds and dungeon slang. Here is the second in a series of posts presenting their creations. I've edited them a bit in terms of place names to make them fit with the setting I've developed over the course of the classifieds. All typos are my errors and I will correct if found. Here's Part 2: DAMSEL WANTED. Adventurer seeks bride. Will not traverse dragon-infested castles, dragon-filled swamps, dragon-inhabited forests, or dragon-owned caves. Damsel must not have poor relations (i.e. evil stepmother) or employ dwarves. Please respond in kind to this publication. DRAGON DEBUNKING! Have a dragon that needs slaying? Call on Dragon Debunkers! We'll slay it for you! Our knights are specially trained to debunk any dragon. Note: Not responsible for loss of prince

Hello there folks coming here from Facebook! I'm not on the big blue F, so I'd appreciate knowing why there's a sudden interest in this post. Please drop a comment below, and then take a look around at the other stuff I've posted here by hitting up the popular post link on the left over there (<---) or the pages list over there on the right (--->). Thanks for dropping by! More dungeoneer slang for Underworld Lore . I tried to get all the way through the alphabet, but ran out of steam: Arseclench . A small, fist-sized passageway connecting two caverns; "Well, I can see the room through this here arseclench, but we can't get in there from here unless you got a shrinking potion or something." Beandipper . One who eats only beans while dungeoneering and thus makes the rest of the party suffer their unending flatulence; i.e. "Next time, Wankle can be the doorman. That beandipper is driving me nuts." Crassling . Any party member who can&

Gavin at City of Iron came up with this idea of a table to explain a character's disappearance between gaming sessions . Here are my contributions: 25. Turned into a guard dog with same number of hit points as character in normal state. If spellcaster, can only cast single-finger somatic cantrips using tail. 26. Character disappears and is replaced with life-size parchment cutout illustration of the character. 27. Turned into a turnip and placed in the cook's supply bag. 28. Transmogrified into eight year old boy in short pants dragging stuffed tiger, both of whom refuse to speak with the party. 29. Turned into inanimate statue melded to floor. Any attempt to chip away at statue will result in appropriate damage to character's feet next game session. 30. Turns out the character was never with the group to begin with--it was all a dream. 31. Turns into a hat. Hat may be worn by another party member and provide an appropriate AC bonus equal to one third th

Greg asked again . It's gone beyond the initial d12 table to become a d20 table as of this writing. Who knows? Maybe it'll be a d30 table soon. Here's my initial list. Leave your additions at the link above. 1. CHERRY FEYGO. Made with real virgin fey teardrops! Grants 1d12 bonus to all CON checks for 1 day. 2. GRAPEWINE FEYGO. Made with 100% organic grape leaves fermented in recycled fey urine. Provides +2 to attacks with clubs and maces. 3. ORANGE PHANTOM. Pure, refreshing, bottled phantom blood mixed with the juice of unripened bleeding doughfruit. Save vs. Poison or suffer 1d4 days of the runs; afterwards, skin is suffused with unnatural glow visible by creatures with infra vision for 1d4 days. 4. RUSTY NAIL HOPTOIT PLUS PIPEWEED EXTRACT. All natural fortified root beer flavored with a hint of vanilla and extra virgin pipeweed extract. Provides all the nutrition of iron rations but makes you hungry for more all the same. Provides double overnight HP recovery per

I teach a creative writing course and a digital narratives course at a community college. On my birthday, I tossed the regularly scheduled programming and had my students write classifieds and dungeon slang. Here is the first in a series of posts presenting their creations. I've edited them a bit in terms of place names to make them fit with the setting I've developed over the course of the classifieds. All typos are my errors and I will correct if found. So, here we go: Are you sad and lonely? Do you just want it all to be over? Do you have fangs and consider yourself a vampire? Not to worry! Witchtiles has you covered! Come participate in our study and earn up to two gallons of blood a night! Participants must be between 600–900 years old, a healthy weight for size and not O+ drinkers. If this is you, don't miss out on this exciting opportunity. Come visit Witchtiles in Walthamthorp TODAY! --Catelyn A. WE'LL BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR! WISH CONSULTANTS. S

WANTED: Trustworthy hobbit rogue seeks patron. Must be rich. Contact Harbot at the Talon & Onion. I'll buy you a pint with your own purse if you don't spot me first! LOST: Legendary birthright to ancient empire. If found, please contact Captain Lance Arlot, Walthamthorp Keep. IF YOU ARE DOWN IN THE DUMPS then you need a dose of MAGNANIMOUS MARVIN'S ALL NATURAL PICK ME UP! Our special blend of herbs and flavorings will give you the energy you need to get through your day. Non-addictive and easy on the stomach. Available at all fine apothecaries in the realm. I WILL BLESS YOUR WEAPONS IN THE NAME OF ARGUD THE GOOD. Helps kill goblins and orcs, and useful against vampires, werewolves, and other shape-shifters. See Brother Dormond at the Church of the Smiting Finger, Taverntoss. Small donation required. LOST: I have lost horse. If you see horse, please bring to me. I give money for lost horse. Horse name is "Horse." Is brown and looks like horse. Fin

Today is my birthday. And also Donutsmas. credit: James Stowe I am 43 today. Celebrate by eating a donut in my honor. That is all.

Greg asked for it : Crapout . A dead-end passage, esp. one filled with dirkle. Dirkle . Calcified feces of unknown origin found in abandoned lairs; e.g. "Bah! What kind of hoard is this? 'Tis nothing but a handful of coppers and dirkle!" Earwasher . A narrow, low-ceiling water-filled passage which must be crawled through while dragging one ear in the water and one on the ceiling in order to pass; e.g. "When you hit the big pool, head to the left and take the earwasher through to the treasure room!" Frump . To explore or enter previously unexplored underground passages, e.g. "We somehow frumped our way into a flail snail mating cavern--it was horrible!" Frumping Canary (also Frumping Thrush or Frumping Fool ). The person taking point and leading the way through a previously unexplored underground complex. Goosh . Water-softened rations warmed over a lantern or torch and thus sooty and foul-tasting; e.g. "Gimmie some of that there go

Another Fantasy Flight Game post, this time in regards to a non-d20 RPG, Fireborn. This was a weird RPG where you play two characters at the same time in different ages: a dragon in a mythic age and that dragon's human reincarnation in modern London. Yeah. weird. I wonder why it didn't take off. I've delved the FFG site at the Internet Wayback Machine to bring you a whole bunch of files related to this game. The setting is rather interesting, but the adventures are probably more adaptable. You can probably run a one-shot game using just the GM Preview and the GM Screen reference sheets and do just fine. You can download the files listed below from my Dropbox . Character Sheets: both editable and non-editable for the 3 character types. GM Screen: Three art files and a reference sheet file--all you really need to run the game are the ref sheets and the GM Preview. FB Lost Lore Errata.pdf - lots of Q&As FB Slang.pdf - nice little guide to British slang Fire W

(EDIT @ 2013-11-04: I fixed the link to the Dropbox. Sorry about that!) Up until 2009, Fantasy Flight Game produced one of the most successful third-party settings, Midnight . It even spawned its own low-budget movie, Midnight Chronicles . I've delved the FFG site at the Internet Wayback Machine to bring you a whole bunch of goodies. You can download them here via Dropbox . FFG Midnight: 2005-07 Midnight 2nd Edition Errata & Clarifications.pdf Forge of Shadow Preview.pdf - nice setting preview, includes three major NPCs Hand Preview.pdf - Prestige class Midnight - The Heart of Erenland (excerpt).pdf - adventure sampler Midnight Character Sheet.pdf Midnight Chronicle Web Trailer.mov - the movie trailer in QuickTime format. Midnight Map.jpg Midnight Preview.pdf Midnight Spell List - Channeler.pdf - see the preview for this class Midnight Spell List.pdf Midnight Web Extra 05 - 2 Prestige Classes.pdf Secrets of Shadow 01 - The God of the Dell.pdf - setting

WANTED: Experienced pack mule in good condition. Must have less than 5,000 leagues ahoof and a white patch on left haunch. Willing to pay decent amount for the right one. NO JENNYS. See Reeda at the Talon & Onion in Walthamthorp. UNLEASH YOUR HIDDEN POWERS! Become a mental superman overnight! Free scroll! Windorf, 27 Market Wayside, Hawkthorp. OUTHOUSES CLEANSED AND DEODORIZED. Why dig new when you can refresh for less? Just mix our dry powder with water and pour into shit-hole. Safe, non-poisonous formulae dissolves normal waste in just hours! Griswold the Minor Laboratories, Wizard Tower 1 -1/2b, Hawkthorp. NOVICE CULTIST WANTED. Did you just join a cult? A curious seeker has questions. Come convince me your god should be my god. Ask for Reeda at the Talon & Onion in Walthamthorp. EARN BIG MONEY! Learn to weave invisible threads in the comfort of your own home! Contact Wanted Weavers, Castle Tower 2, Taverntoss. CAN YOU EARN 50sp a week writing classifieds? Enclose

Remember Iron Heroes ? Of course you don't. It was a variant 3.5e Player's Handbook published by Malhavoc Press that was then handed off to Fiery Dragon . The nice thing is that because it was d20, it's pretty easy to convert the material to any D&D-type ruleset. Malhavoc and Fiery Dragon even made a handful of free stuff for the setting back in the day. And I've gathered it here in my Dropbox for you . Here's what you'll find in that folder: from Malhavoc: GenCon 2005 Demo, in both Microsoft Word and RTF formats The King Must Die! introductory adventure, plus a pdf of pre-gens and a pdf of tokens Borgnok's Raid , a free web enhancement for Mastering Iron Heroes from Fiery Dragon: Bloodwood campaign setting Glacier Keep adventure for 4th level characters All of these come courtesy of the Internet Archive Wayback Machine and doing a Google site-specific, file-type search (i.e.: typing "site:foo.com filetype:pdf" into G