Monday, April 4, 2011

D is for . . .

Dungeon
We spelunk the depths, we slay the orcs
We lust for the dragon's hoard
And all along we sing this song:
Fuck it, it's a dungeon!

We fight, we die, we spring some traps
& Grok the Halfling ain't coming back—
Crap, I think the mage miscast:
Fuck it, it's a dungeon!

The ways are dark and things go bump
(Is that Orcus or is it a flumph?);
Who really cares, this place is a dump—
Fuck it, it's a dungeon!

Do we stay, do we fight,
do we turn and take flight
In our deepest darkest despair?
Or do we blame ourselves
For trusting the elves
And this ripped map of Karnal Throk's Lair?

We carry a torch, a pole, and a rope
But it's gonna take more than a bucket of hope
To pull us through to our ultimate goal:
Fuck it, it's a dungeon!

I've lost my shield, my sword is bent,
Any treasure we find is already spent
To pay our bills and the inn keeper's rent:
Fuck it, into the dungeon!